readers speak: holiday gifts.

I’ve had many emails this week asking when the famous Design for Mankind gift guide will be published, and I’ve really been dragging my heels in that department this year. I just can’t justify promoting additional spending when so many of my friends, readers and family members are out of jobs— holiday or not.

I’d love to see our community spending time this holiday season— not money. Visiting soup kitchens, delivering meals, ringing bells. [I would mention caroling, but that would be NO gift from a tone-deaf gal as myself]. What a perfect time for our nation to return to our roots and the real heart of the holidays.

In lieu of gifts this year, my husband’s family is going bowling— all thirty of us, including our 90-year-old grandparents and 2-year-old niece. And to be honest, I’m looking forward to this event WAY more than our traditional Christmas. No preparation, fuss or debt— just bring on the bowling shoes and celebrate our family.

So, when you’re all centered around your Thanksgiving table this year, brainstorm some interesting ideas for this season’s festitvities. Trust me— it will be a holiday you’ll actually remember.

And with that said, I’m taking the extended weekend off and will return to regular posting Monday. No gift guide this year— just inspiring work from top-notch artists and designers. I hope you’ll forgive me, but I just can’t do it!

Any special plans for the holiday season? What are you gifting this year? What do you hope to receive?
This is your forum— take it away!

  • Good going! im making all my presents this year myself so i can spend my money on going home to my parents for the holiday without worrying too much. This is not just because of the economy, but also a general fatigue with spending spending spending…!

  • I love this idea! I have been feeling the same- my family and I have been plotting what we can do that is different this year-maybe a dance or pinata party instead of the gifts….

  • yay for you! truly excellent thoughts and even more excellent use of this forum to spread them…we’re thinking like this at our house this year too…tho’ we are going to have a tree and the food, just no bunch of stuff we don’t need.

  • since everyone in our family is old enough to buy their own gifts and get exactly what s/he wants, we don’t exchange them, anymore. we just get together for dinner. i love your bowling idea and scott will, too! happy thanksgiving!

  • yes – here we are two cultural workers (art/film) without any incomes (but a three days workshop in december) .. and money ticking away. not many gifts here but for the son (3,5 years old) – who’ll probably get some homemade stuff again (though this is actually our department). And my sister will probably – surprise! – get a painting or a print by me… Guess what mummy will get?

    Though I would encourage all those giftbuyers out there to by some handmade stuff from starving designers or artists – instead of plastic things made in China…

  • i think your idea is splendid.

    i’m also a huge fan of bowling. so knock em down erin

    happy thanksgiving!
    xo

  • Each member of my family is exchanging names this week and buying one $20 gift for the name he/she draws, instead of everyone buying expensive or many inexpensive gifts for everyone else.

    With all the money/time we save, we are making and sending care packages to Pakistan. And this is the Christmas I’ve been most excited about!

  • i love that idea.
    i think you’ve got the right idea, I was just talking with my guy saying we don’t want to get each other gifts, just getting gifts for the little one – a couple of nice wooden toys we were already planning to get for the next playing stage.
    thanks for putting this out there.

  • Excellent idea (xmas day and bowling)! I loathe xmas most years because of all the excess – spending, food, heat (in Australia), alcohol consumption etc etc
    Most people think I’m a bit of grump about it but I really would rather be camping in the bush away from it all.

  • i love all of your thoughts— thank you so much for weighing in on your holidays!

    the gift exchange is really a great way to go, too. we’re doing a $20 secret santa exchange for my side of the family, and i’m so excited to see who i draw! :)

  • i’m similar to kylie (maybe it’s an aussie thing) in that some people think i can be a bit of a grunp about christmas. i just hate the excesses too. this year i’ll be making all my presents which is not only heaps more fun, but they’ll be more appreciated (hopefully!).

  • Hey, I have an idea–it might be fun instead of the holiday gift guide to have people who are making presents take pictures and send them in. I’m making little Christmas tree ornaments (as you know)–nothing major. But it would be fun to see what else people are doing and swap ideas. Just a thought!

  • Erin, this is why I love you. You are good to the core. What a fantastic way to spend the Christmas holiday! This year we are foregoing presents and donating money to animal rescue organizations. Our family are huge dog lovers, so this just felt right. Last year we all picked letters that less fortunate children sent to Santa, and we donated and wrapped gifts for them. I might do one or two of these again, as well. When I find myself shopping for couches for my new home, even though we’re hurting financially, I just can’t imagine turning my back to those who are really in need. You can spend $50 at Target or KMart and get a little child a coat, some gloves, and a toy. I mean, it’s a no-brainer, really.

    Anyway, I hope you have a great holiday, my dear. You deserve it!! xx

  • I do love that idea of doing something with the whole extended family instead of spending a fortune on a lot of gifts :) It will be much more memorable.

  • good (actually, FANTASTIC) for you! yet another one of the many reasons why i love your blog!!!
    i usually make most of my gifts anyways, but two years ago i decided to stop giving gifts to my friends – instead i buy a “gift” donation in their name, to various charities.
    and this year i think my family is going to do the $20 “secret santa” thing as well :)

  • it’s presents for everyone!!!

    my husband and i plan on making holiday gifts for each other though :) he’s a sculptor so i’m assuming he’s making me something 3d :) we’re also headed for the southwest as usual. i’ve never had a white christmas, so i’d like to go to lake tahoe prior. we’re going to volunteer as well.

    and i LOVE the bowling idea! i’m going to suggest that :) a board game party would be neat too!

  • You are so right on. So many community organizations are going to suffer this year due to the economy — often the first thing people cross off their spending lists is the money they give to charity. Time is free, so if you can’t give money give time for sure. Thanks for the reminder. (I actually did a post on my favorite local charity today in fact!)

    And I having a pair of bowling salt & pepper shakers that I think I need to get to you to use as a high game prize (believe it or not, my brother got two bowling S&P sets for his b-day.) :-)

  • I think this is such a wonderful and noble idea, Erin. Good on you! Besides Christmas is really supposed to be about spending time with family and not necessarily about presents :)

  • Bowling for christmas :) That is a grand idea! The idea of consuming is so magnified here in the states that it can get depressing, super fast! (ie going to a Costco or any store of that magnitude makes me sad) It’s refreshing to be able to create instead of consume and I wholeheartedly agree that no gift guides is refreshingly nice!

    This christmas, we’re only giving one gift thus like good writing, it has to be short and precise!

    :)

  • I totally get your point!

    In my family, for Xmas, we buy a gift for ourselves and we play a little game where we have to find what others bought themselves. This way, everyone spends less (or according to their revenue), everyone loves what they have and it’s more about having fun than just stuff being given around. We’ve been doing this for like 5 years now, and it’s so much part of our tradition now!!

    On the other hand, many of us people making things and selling them for a living, are really suffering already this year from the lack of sales. I am a little sad that no crafter will get a little help, too. We cannot plant our salary of course, so budgeting is even harder this year.

    For sure, everyone is careful with money these days, but there a still shoppers out there who ARE looking for a few unique gifts for family and friends, and I’m sure they would love the suggestions, and at the same time help out a crafter rather than buy some machine-made items at a department store.

    Let’s just say, I’m kinda torn! lol

  • My fiance’s family (mine don’t celebrate christmas) always go by a maximum £10 on gifts rule. Means we tend to end up making stuff, or swapping skills (this is a very popular one, I once asked my sister-in-law-to-be to help me go clothes shopping as she has a great eye for colour and what suits people. I didn’t actually buy anything, but learnt so much about what colours, shapes, styles suit me. And in exchange I did her a load of photography for her catalog as I have an SLR and a light tent and good lighting etc), or just doing something ‘together’ – which is WAY more satisfying (and less stressful) then trying to buy gifts … With his parents (who REALLY want to buy us stuff) we tend end up getting organic food hampers or money specifically to spend in the local gourmet/organic/healthfood shop … Stock up on healthy yummy stuff thats just that little bit beyond our budget to buy…

    Your family bowling event sounds FAB!!!!!!!!!!

  • I wish I could convince my family to down size on gifts this year! It’s our baby’s first christmas so I told them to make something for my husband and I and just concentrate on little Riley girl. I told them that we will be making their gifts this year (with the adition of something small for everyone from various artists on Etsy). My mom said that i could make the ladies jewellery any time…but I wasn’t making jewellery for them this year:S *sigh*

  • My family is talking about exchanging no gifts this year too, but I hadn’t thought of replacing it with something like bowling. How great!

  • Oh! What about a “gift” guide that focuses on free ideas–things you can make, trade, find, do, etc. for your loved ones. New traditions, activities, and such.
    I know your ideas would be so creative!

  • What a lovely sentiment. This year I told my family not to give me things but asked for each person to spend some time teaching me something (photography, website design, cooking, golf). :)

  • Yes— I love these ideas! You all are so fascinating!

    Janick— I was torn, as well. I think I’ll continue to post crafters and products, just not under the ‘gift guide’ theme. Who am I to dictate how much people spend and who they shall be for?

    And Mithi— I love the idea of swapping skills! Wowza!

    You all are so smart. ;)

  • the holidays are about spending cherished time with family, so looks like you guys are doin’ it the right way! way to go and score a big one for us!! :)

    we spend the holidays with my lil family and my mil who cooks up a fabulous lasagna every year~can hardly wait for that! i’d rather sink my teeth into that than get gifts!!

  • We decided last Christmas that we were done with gift giving. Since there are no more kids under the age of 24 we figured there must be something better to do with our hard earned cash than rack our brains trying to find the “perfect gift” for our family members and friends. Soooo… this year we are all pitching in and buying a cow/goat/chicken or two for needy families in a less fortunate part of the world. I’ll probably design a cute goat card that reads something like… “I thought about buying you the latest Apple product but instead I bought you a goat (sort of)!”

  • well, and what about making stuff for your loved ones???

    Giving something is so representative, and somehow the Holidays seem empty without gifts… but you really don’t have to spend money. I am crafting all my gifts… and well don’t tell my friends or family but none is over $10 in cost of supplies or real cost… Some are as cheap as $1…

    I agree too… we should give time… Sometimes we forget to spend time with our family and friends and compensate it with gifts so…

    I think it is not about spending but about GIVING whatever you can… I enjoy giving gifts to people so much I really don’t care if they give me something back…

    Love you Erin!!!

  • Um…I’ve nothing to say about the gift guide decision, but I really want the blue skirt that girl is wearing in this photo. It’s been added to my wishlist.

  • Erin, that is so hilarious that you are going bowling. I read your post out loud to my husband (while he was playing xbox of course) and he thinks it’s the best idea ever! You will have so much fun :)

    Hope you had a great holiday back in the midwest!

  • i love the bowling idea erin! we are only doing presents for children this year too (for the second year in a row) and at least from me, those will definitely be handmade. i’ll probably be sending something little handmade to some other friends and family members, but most likely it will be something small, and probably in the form of jams that i made and canned over the summer.

  • You are truly wonderful Erin! I totally agree with you. I hope you’re enjoying your time with your family :)
    xo

  • We only spend money on the kids and parents. For the rest of us, we are limiting our gifts to creative and under $50. I figure we can all afford to buy our own little luxury goods so there is no need to gift each other with another LV bag.

  • Uncle S loves to watch 1 Christmas movie a night, starting the day after Thanksgiving. Our other traditions: playing “Secret Santa” to at least 1 child in our school; taking a night-time tour of light displays (in PJs, of course, with hot chocolate tucked away for the parched!); reading the Christmas story or attending a candlelight service on Christmas Eve; waking up to Handel’s Hallelujah Chorus on Christmas morning and later singing “Happy Birthday” to Jesus as we open presents. In honor of whose birthday it is, the “biggest” gift each year goes to world missions. Without a doubt, the best gifts at Christmas or anytime are love, peace, laughter, and time together.

  • brilliant. i’ve heard and participated in more than a few conversations this weekend about excess, stuff, the overwhelming nature of the holidays. we’ve tried to scale back and/or go handmade for the last few years, but i love the idea of experiences instead of things. now i’ve got my thinking cap on…

  • so funny you should post this. my gifts are always pretty minimal and mostly handmade (it’s how i roll), but since changing jobs i’ve been aggressively looking for volunteer ops. i’m not the richest gal, but i count myself as very lucky and the greatest gift, for me, would be to spread that feeling to others. my family has also agreed to a BUDGET which, for me, is the best gift ever. we are all over-givers; each going for quantity over quality. i am so happy that this holiday season will be more about finding or making something that is truly meaningful. :]

    hurrah for bowling. that would be my ideal for ANY special event.

  • I love your bowling idea! And volunteering and visiting soup kitchens are also fantastic ways to spread real cheer.

    For the first time in history, my side of the family is nixing the always expensive gift exchange. Hooray! Now if only I could get my husband’s family to follow suit…

  • Hi Erin,
    I think the idea of spending time together as a family is spot on. I believe that no matter what someone’s ability to spend on gifts, enjoying the season for what it is meant to be is the most important. My gift guide this year is meant to provide ideas and inspiration. Some ideas will be exactly right and others will be just that…ideas. I also have a couple of pages of inexpensive and even free gifts coming further into the guide. However, in order for our economy to get moving again, I do hope that those who can afford it, do spend. Enough jobs have been lost. As long as people spend according to what they can and as long as people give gifts with meaning no matter what the price, I believe it will be a very Merry Christmas.

  • I completely understand and I feel the SAME way this year. It’s hard to justify shopping and adding more debt just to give a gift. I want to spend time with family and friends…isn’t that the greatest gift? I love that you put this out there.

  • Oh, what fun! I love bowling- even if I am not very skilled at it. For me its all bout the dirty martinis, clank of the pins, and that little flair when you kick your leg behind you…now that I am GOOD at :)

  • Brilliant! My family has decided not to exchange gifts this year. We are going to do something together as a family. We just haven’t decided what yet.

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