• F

    dear bee // 22.

    12.14.2012 / FAMILY


    Dear Bee,

    You’re part of a union, aren’t you? I knew it all along. You started picketing against nursing this week (again) and I kept thinking that part of it was teething, or maybe it could have been the 24-hour whirlwind trip to Seattle I tried to take Monday but instead was stuck in the Minneapolis airport for millions of hours, pumping milk at the charging station next to all of the businessmen with their big fingers and tiny phones. But then I came home and realized you started a sleep strike as well, so now I’m just convinced you’re the union leader of all babies and are going to make me buy you poster board and glitter glue next time I’m at the drugstore. Strikes are fun for you, aren’t they? I see it in your eyes.

    You have this look about you, Bee. It’s half teenager, half puppy and I fear you’re going to perfect it any day now so you can pull it out of your pocket when it’s time for toddler leverage, like when you break a vase or put bubble gum in my hair. And I’m realizing that no one ever told me that once I’d get over the fear of breaking my baby, my mind would somehow transition into a fear that my baby is going to break me. You’re a drug these days, a magnificent upper that I keep drinking, knowing that at the end of the night you’re going to turn to me with your teenager-puppy look and ask to borrow the car even though you’ve wrecked it twice. (I’m totally going to say yes, which proves that you’ve somehow already impaired my assessment skills beyond restoration.)

    You’re super cute when you poo. I’m sorry I have to discuss this here, but I want to remember forever and always how funny it is to watch you excrete into your pants. Your head goes down, way down, as if you were searching the rug for a missing Lego and suddenly there is a volcanic explosion that happens below your waist. You then grunt like a frat boy or gorilla or He-Man until the lava has flown and your pants are at peace. And then you smile, as if you’ve achieved a feat beyond your wildest dreams. It’s endearing and fascinating to watch and makes me look forward to 10am daily. (10am is Poo O’Clock and I have a sneaking suspicious you’ve been snacking on fiber between meals because you are more regular than a box of frosted mini wheats.)

    Teething still makes you sort of unfortunate to be around, but we’re getting by with an ice-filled sock and your wooden teethers. Also, lots of repeat plays of The Jungle Book soundtrack and dance parties in the kitchen. You seem to respond well to constant distractions, which of course means you’re going to be a total nightmare on future road trips.

    Tonight we’re going to order takeout, sit by the Christmas tree and finish our holiday cards. I can’t wait for you to learn to use your thumbs so you can be on stamp duty. It’s exhausting and you sort of owe me for all of this teething business.

    Maybe next year?


    • Kristin

      I am obsessed with your letters to bee! happy friday :)

    • Hi Erin, I’ve been reading your lovely Minikind posts for a while now as our bebe’s are the same age & it’s been so funny to read as I’m going through the exact same phases will our Mr Sydney. No Poo O’Clock over here but he sure loves a good explosion! Haha.

    • Library Lady

      What a cute picture of little Bee….she will get her way on either side of the picket line with that winning smile!

    • These letters are so sweet, you can tell you are such a loving mom. She is going to looove reading these someday.

    • The Poo! My little guy’s favorite place to fill the diaper is his bouncy seat, aka The Poo Chair. Just the other day he let out a few grunts and lots of other noises, for the LONGEST time, and since we let him finish he filled that diaper so much it leaked anyway. And then yes, he has the biggest smile. It’s really funny when he farts and smiles – such a boy!

    • LOVE everything about this. I can so relate, Stella, our 6 month old has a new agenda every day and I’m already panicked over whats to come. Who would’ve thought I would be the softy?? Definitely stealing this letter idea as well. Royalties are on the way. xx

    • Ha, poo o clock!! That’s so funny. My Son doesn’t have a regular hout, but the rest is very recognizable ( is this the right word in English? I suppose you know what I mean). Funny face, fireworks and then a big relief-smile… Luckily no teething yet and no strikes against nursing… Hopefully he’ll skip the latter.

    • So Erin, when do the strikes against nursing and sleeping stop? Do they stop? Do they get better at least? Because going on two weeks now Little Man has decided it’s more fun to do anything but nurse, and even more fun to stop napping most the time, and sleeping at night. I thought it was the weird holiday schedule, or that he had a couple little colds, but no… his classmate at daycare, born the same day, has been going through the same things and then I remembered this Letter to Bee and Arrrrgh!

      So, does it get better? = )

      • Hi Jamie!

        Ha, you poor thing! Bee’s back on a pretty good napping “schedule,” but nursing strikes are still happening for sure. I think it’s teething-related for her? I’ve read somewhere that everything is cyclical, so it’s not really a pattern unless it lasts for more than 3 weeks. Let’s hope that’s the case with your little man!!! So sorry to hear. :( We’re getting by with lots of ice cubes wrapped in a burpcloth and frozen teethers. (For now!)

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