We’re lucky enough to have a [very energetic and doting] grandmother two doors down and a handful of neighbors who love to entertain Bee when we’re in a pinch, so finding reliable babysitters is rarely an issue for us. But for those of you in larger cities where babysitting fees are outrageous (seriously, $15/hour?) or finding a trustworthy sitter has been trying, here are a few tips gathered from the oh-so-wise mothers who have shared their smart alternatives…
- Try an at-home date. My friend Tsh‘s oldest child is nine – not old enough yet to babysit, but old enough to be chomping at the bit to babysit. So, to both give her experience and to give Tsh and her husband a cheap date, they host Tate Nights. (It works out well that her name is Tatum, or Tate for short.) Here’s how it works, in Tsh’s words: “On Tate Nights, we have our date upstairs—we get some dessert and watch a movie or play a game while Tate is in charge of her two younger brothers downstairs. She feeds them the simple dinner we made, then gets them dressed for bed and puts on a quick movie. After the movie, she reads them a bedtime story, tucks them in, then knocks on our door so that we can give everyone goodnight kisses. She gets babysitting experience with the safety of us being only a door knock away; we get an at-home date for $2 an hour!”
- Consider timing. A smart girlfriend of mine recently admitted she was doing date night all wrong. “Think about it,” she shared. “On typical date nights, we’re paying $10/hour for someone to put our kid to bed and then sit on the couch and watch loads of TV!” So instead of scheduling date nights, she schedules date days. She hires a babysitter to play with her children – making art, playing tag outside, etc – while she and her husband sneak away for the day and come home to exhausted children and a babysitter that’s earned her keep. “It’s like an extended date,” she says, “because we come home relaxed and rejuvenated, and then still have the whole night ahead of us after the kids go to bed.”
- Snag a mother’s helper. Similar to Tsh’s date night above, a mother’s helper is a genius solution for affordable babysitting if you’re in a pinch. I’ve shared our experience with our mother’s helper right here, and gracious, what a difference it’s made in both socializing Bee as well as gifting me a free window of time to cook a nice dinner, fold laundry or work on a project uninterrupted (I know, can you imagine?).
- Arrange a babysitting swap. My girlfriend in Seattle has a babysitting swap with her best friend – she watches her friend’s newborn for an afternoon and a few days later, her friend hangs out with her 5-year-old son. The mothers love the change of pace in learning another parenting stage/style, and it’s great for bonding the families together. Plus, a free window of alone time on your “off” day? Genius.
Tell me, what are your secret babysitting tips and tricks? I’d love to hear!
We’re very lucky to have willing Grandparents who also each have Forrest one day a week for daycare, I have willing girlfriends who like to play for a few hours, AND a neighbor down the hill who loves to watch him in a pinch – all to say we 1) still don’t get out often and 2) having all these loved ones available makes me really leery of hiring on someone I don’t know. All great tips above, though. And might I add to parents, get out of the house if you can, it’s good for your relationship beyond your children! = )
Love your thoughts, Jamie, yes!!! It’s so funny how – even with a large support system – it can be so tricky to get out?
Similar to idea number one above, when I was a kid about 9 or 10, my parents’ friends used to come over for dinner and bring their much younger kids (let’s say, 3 and 5 or so), and they would give me $5 or so to watch their kids for them while everyone enjoyed dinner. They got to socialize with their adult friends and I didn’t mind playing with their kids, plus I got a little bit of pocket money. Win-win! That being said, I don’t know anyone with a 9 year old, so this won’t work for me :)
So genius! I love hearing this tip from your perspective and am hoping a 9-year-old floats into your family soon enough? ;)
Never thought of #2, thanks for sharing these tips!
You’re so welcome!
The day date is really, really smart! Right now we mostly do in-home dates after putting Rooney to bed, but we could really use a proper date one of these days :)
Ha, I hear ya! Us, too!
These are great suggestions — I particularly love “Tate Night” even though I can’t steal the idea for myself right now. I’ve got a daughter just a few weeks younger than Bee, and we still haven’t figured out the babysitting thing. We don’t have any local family, and rely on our daycare’s “parents night out” but they only do that every 2 months. I seriously need to just find a reliable babysitter!
Ahhhh I’m sending you good vibes for finding a great one soon!!! :)